Thursday, February 25, 2010

Happiness: The state of the mind

What is happiness? Is it fulfillment of our earthly desires? Is it something that deals with having something that we want? How can you define happiness? Is there any scale for measuring happiness? What are the guidelines that ensure that a person is happy? Is wealth a synonym of happiness? Is fulfillment of all your wish is happiness? What exactly is happiness?
Theoretically happiness is a State of well-being characterized by emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy. Happiness has nothing to do with wealth or other worldly pleasures. People generally have a wrong notion that money is happiness; having what you want is happiness. But this isn’t happiness. Otherwise all the wealthy person would have been happy. Few people think that with money they can buy everything including happiness. But this isn’t the reality as most of the rich person die from stress that means they are not happy their mental tension keeps them awake in the night. They have the most expensive mattress but no sleep. They have the best food available but can’t eat because of their ill health. They have large houses to live in but don’t have a home. They are surrounded by many people but don’t have a family. They can buy everything but can they buy happiness? The answer is obvious no. Happiness isn’t equivalent to your wealth.
We got one thing clear that happiness has nothing to with how much wealth you possess. Now coming to the next point is happiness related to the fulfillment of your desires? Is it something that goes with attaining all your goals? The answer to some extent is yes it is. In this materialistic world a person is happy when he achieves something or some of his wishes are realized. You won’t see people being happy after loosing something or celebrating when he has failed to succeed. Happiness has a close association with what your mental state. Many times you would see people who excel but are not satisfied with it and a result are not happy. And many times you would see people being happy by just earning a loaf of bread. Happiness is thus a state of mind.
Measuring happiness, I must say science has developed a lot but there isn’t any instrument invented till now that can measure happiness of a person. These are closely related with the emotion of a person. You cannot gauze the emotions with any equipment. It’s just a feeling that comes from within and can be understood only. There are few things in the world that can only be felt. You cannot explain them with all your witness a similar is the consequence with happiness.
Happiness has a lot to do with your willingness and expectations. A person expecting something that is highly unexpected will more or less remain unhappy. Willingness also has an important role in happiness of a person. A person who is willing to be happy is happy no matter whatever he faces in life. Even if he doesn’t achieve what he wanted, even if he has failed in all his attempts. This comes from the mentality of the person.
A positive mentality people will always see the brighter side of things even if he hasn’t succeeded there is a happiness that atleast he has tried, atleast he has given his best atleast he didn’t left it upon destiny for his outcome. Atleast he didn’t keep mump when there was a need to speak and spoke whatever was there in his heart. Atleast he didn’t wait for the opportunity to happen for him but instead created all the opportunity that he got. This is one of the essentials of happiness never leave anything in life as granted. Whatever you want to do, whatever you want to achieve whatever you want in life go and strive for it. Never leave it upon destiny, those who wait for the right time their time never comes. The right time is when you realize what you have to do & doing it at that very moment. You should always keep in mind it’s never too late to start. Don’t have a fear of loosing or not getting what you wanted. Because similar to success happiness also belongs to only those who try. Unless you speak up how the world would would know what you really want? Unless you make efforts how would you reach to your objective? And unless you achieve your life’s objective how can you be happy?
Here I am stressing upon the ultimate happiness and not the happiness that people may enjoy in day to day life. There isn’t a soul who can understand a person’s silence. Similarly there isn’t a soul who can make you happy; you yourself have to make efforts for what you want to do for the sake of your happiness.
How can you attain happiness? Happiness as I said earlier is a state of mind. A person who is willing to be happy is happy. There is no doubt that a person who has achieved his goal is happy but the person who has given his all is happy, a person who has tried is happy, a person who has done whatever it was possible from his behalf is happy. There may be frustrations for his failures but that frustration will be short lived as in the long run he would be happy because he has done what he could. Therefore it’s my advice to all that whatever you want to do try and give your best even if you don’t succeed, you won’t blame yourself afterwards that you didn’t try.
My words of encouragement are especially for those who by some reason couldn’t fulfill their dream and are unhappy of the outcome for all their efforts in life. But if my words didn’t comfort here’s some thing especially for those who are distressed. Whenever you feel that you are the most neglected of the lot and happiness is not for you just think of the poorest and most hapless person you ever saw in your life and compare their unhappiness with yours. Just for a second think what would you do if you were in that place? I am sure all your anxiety would soon be over & you would be able to get over all your sadness.
Thank god for whatever you have got in your life. Count your blessings & not your trials. The miseries in life are much bigger then what you have faced till now. Happiness is not what you have achieved but what your attitude towards life is. It’s all in the state of mind….

Friday, February 19, 2010

A letter…

To my love
Niharika
Wherever I may be in my future alive or dead…you know there will always be a soul (soul never dies) who would always pray for you who would always be ready to do anything just for your wellbeing. I tried my best, gave my entire whatever I had just to sort out the differences created because of those misunderstandings. But as everyone knows time waits for none and when your time comes you have to go because death doesn’t give life a second chance when it has to come it comes, similarly I am no more the person I was, I am alive but dead from within. Everyone has to carry on with life and adapt to situations whatever they face in their life but Even after so many years I am still in those old days thinking day and night & wishing if I could turn things around. I am still living in the past and I know there is no future for me. If god would have given me a single opportunity I would have shown you what you meant to me. As I couldn’t control the things and relations turned out from bad to worse. The only thing that comes to my mind is to go away and leave you the way you are, as you are happy in your life. The sole objective of my life was to make you happy with my selfishness that I might see you happy throughout my life by being along side you. You are happy without me and it seems that you will be happy only if I am not there with you. Even my remembrance distress you and you don’t want me in your life anymore the only option left for me is go as far as I could so that I might not trouble you anymore even by mistake. I know sorry & thank you are the words that shouldn’t be told to someone who are really close but I have to speak these words to you not because my thinking’s have changed but because it’s my last talk to you. I am really grateful to you atleast there was a time which I could cherish as my best moment of my life-the time I spent with you. I am really sorry if I had hurt you in anyway, I know I can’t heal your wounds but the only relief I can give to you is by going away from you forever. My last wish is that whomsoever you live with in future, may he prove a better companion to me. He may love you more then what I ever could. He may fulfill all your desires especially those 3m’s (Money, Mehal, Mercedes). And most importantly he may make you happy throughout your life….
May god bless you.
Goodbye Niharika
With regards
Debashish

Friends what do you think why did Debashish wrote this letter?
Do you think is he going to commit suicide? Or is he just going away from her forever?
It’s a guarantee the more you read and think about this letter the more confused you will be. I have fused suspense in the story so that the readers may find it interesting. I want to fuse few more things so that the readers sink deep into the lines. Why do you think was the major reason that let Debashish to write this letter? Has the girl betrayed? Did she leave him? Did Debashish do something that she could never forgive him and the only way out was to leave? Has the girl found someone else?

Readers please give me with your opinion about those questions asked. If you can just imagine this to be a true story then what would you think the final outcome would be if the girl had read the letter before he left her? What would you have done if you were in place of the boy/girl? Do you think the person really loved the girl or he is running away from the fear that he may loose her? Is this the inferiority from the boy’s behalf? What do you think was the fate of Debashish? How can you save the boy from committing whatever step that he is going to take?
A letter that left so many questions unanswered….

Are you a friend?

Seasons may come and seasons may go,
Everything withers in due course you know,

But there is one thing that's as fresh as the morning dew,
The next line I have already told few years ago,

For now I want friendship with you,
That lasts forever just as the new,

That’s the best thing I can ask from you,
Are you willing to give what I expect from you?

Don’t say no because of any ego,
As you are the only one whom I know

Kind, helpful, caring as friends woo,
That makes me feel the way I do.

Be a friend, selfless just like the few
In return I will be a friend to you.

Monday, February 15, 2010

Last word

As all of us know there are many things in life no matter how hard we try we never get them. Call it fate or any spiritual power but it’s the most important thing that brings about change in people’s life. When people are happy they seldom care for things but when it’s the opposite they look out for their mistakes, their faults they had made in their past that let them to see a present which they never want. Sometimes they never reach to any conclusion for their demise of life. Giving up is not the way, you have to live and face whatever comes up to your life. Here’s a story of a person whose life changed after he met his life.
Arup was one of the carefree guys you would see. He never thought he would be one who is worried about all those petty things like feelings and sentiments. He never had time for these things and he thought he had everything thing in life and is enjoying his life to its fullest. But as it’s said he was missing the essence of life that is love. And finally one day he met his dream girl. And he never knew what he once quoted as “love is made for the emotional fools” was applicable to him also. His thinking changed and he was changing too and the credit goes to the girl whom he loved. Here’s the story
Arup: what is this love?
Girl: have you ever seen titanic? See it you will know it.
Arup: (puzzled) that means a person who hasn’t seen titanic doesn’t know anything about love?
Girl: do you think romance is necessary in love relation? If yes, then according to you which is the most wonderful romantic act?
Arup: to be with the your beloved in solitude and share all your feelings with her.
Girl: I must say you are not at all romantic you can share all your feelings and love with your best friend too. But the one you love is something more then a friend. Okay tell me your date of birth I will see numerology.
Arup: its 29th May
Girl: don’t mind but it’s written. You are fun loving. You don’t bother about future. You want to live every moment of life you don’t have much believe in love rather you enjoy flirting with the opposite sex.
Arup: is that all written? Well I must tell you one thing you should believe in what you see and not go by these books. You know me the best and you know if any of the things you just said goes with me or not.
Girl: do you think can anybody fall in love twice.
Arup: I don’t know much but according to me love happens only once.
Girl: do you know I am suffering from leukemia (cancer).
Arup: my god. Is it serious? Don’t say yes I will die.
Girl: uff! Why do you believe in whatever I say? I was just joking.
Arup: You know how much I love you and I will die if anything that happens to you.
Girl: you will have to promise that you will never think of dying. Always think of your parents they are the only one who are yours. Never leave your parents alone even for your love.
Arup: I promise you I will never think of dying.
Girl: please don’t cry after hearing this. Speaking truth still I don’t have any feeling of love towards you. I can’t stop you from loving me but even you cannot stop me from loving anybody else.
Arup: (almost in tears) I love you I will love you for my entire life. You are free to find anybody who loves you but for me you were my first and last love.
Girl: why are you like this? Don’t be like this people will take undue advantage of you. By the way you are my dream my love my life. I just want to spend my entire life with you.
Arup: (with a sigh relief) even I feel the same dear.
Girl: according to me getting engaged is just getting bound with chains. Can’t even enjoy with friends, I have seen my friends those who are not engaged are happy. You know whatever I said you as your numerology I want you to be like that. Start flirting and don’t ever take any relation so seriously. Then you will never feel the pain.
Arup: thanks for all those words. But you know I am happy with what I am.
Girl: I was just checking you out. Always be what you are.
Arup: thanks
Girl: do you know pains for love are sweeter far then all pleasures. Believe in love.
Arup: yes I do believe in my love.
Girl: someone once said “love doesn’t need proof it just needs the belief.”
Girl: Love is like standing on the wet cement longer you stay harder it is to leave if you try to go you can’t go without leaving your foot prints behind.
After reading this everyone would say common these are the normal things. But my point is did you see how that girl taught him what life is? Well these are the things which can only be felt. The girl went away from Arup’s life forever but she saved Arup’s life, taught him about love, hope, life’s long journey, debt towards his parents. Each and every word that she spoke even when she was joking, she wanted him to comply with that so that he may not suffer afterwards. That’s the reason why she spoke many things that were contradictory many a times but it was all for Arup’s benefit. The most hurting moment for Arup was that his beloved once said that he won’t be able to see even her shadow (she said this once when see was angry with him) and it turned out to be a reality.
After this Arup’s life changed for ever. Here’s what he learnt about love:
*Love is always patient & kind. It’s never jealous. Love is never boastful or conceded. It is never rude or selfish. It doesn’t take offence and it’s not resentful. Love takes no pleasure in other people sins, delight and truth. It is always ready to excuse, to trust, to hope & in doing right in whatever comes. Love is a single soul dwelling in two bodies. Love is like the wind you can’t see but you can feel it*.(*refrence: A walk to remember)
Time goes by people come and go from our life but there is one thing that remains forever that is the memories (love)….. Last word that Arup said to his love: “no matter how hard you try you will never be able to wipe out my love for you. You can try you will fail, it’s guaranteed.”
Arup’s love is no more with him but it’s the love that he had within him that keeps him going on in his life. It’s not just a story but something to learn….hope people would get the inner meaning and would apply to their life.
Love is not just finding and getting your love it’s about sacrificing your love for the benefit of your love even to the peril of your life.

Thursday, February 11, 2010

First love…..

First love is precious and is treasured, it tends to remain with your life as one of the sweetest memories even when you are of 80.For few this first love turns out to be their last one too. With all those dates and incidents I have taken into consideration is to bring about a real feeling so that everyone can relate with their personal lives. We know one can reach to the depth of their heart when they associate anything with themselves. So here I am with the story of Mithun.
Love at first sight….does it really exists… who knows? Is this any of the imaginative novel or a movie script? Just read and decide yourself…..
22nd June 2004 the first day of Mithun’s new school. He is now a higher secondary student. Mithun was very excited as he was in a new city, new place, new environment, new people and new friends. He didn’t know he would meet someone who would change his life forever. Mithun entered the main gate of the school and was quite happy seeing the scenic beauty in the form of flowers and planted trees on the front portion of the school. Slowly he walked to the entrance and saw a board on which the list of school toppers was listed. He was dumbstruck to read the last name that is the topper of 2004 batch of class 10th. The reason was he couldn’t pronounce the name as it was the first time he was reading such a typical name. He went to the class and saw everybody happy and wishing each other for the 1st day of the school. Mithun occupied the last corner seat as it was the only visible seat vacant. Suddenly he saw 3 girls on the 2nd last row of 2nd column had a wild laugh. The girl sitting at the centre was laughing heartily. That was the first time Mithun saw her. Her innocent carefree laugh was enough to jitter Mithun’s heart. Mithun asked the name of the girl from the student sitting beside him and he uttered the same name that he read on the board before coming to the class. Mithun heart was full of unbound joy as the girl was as mysterious as her name. He couldn’t utter her name and was struck by speaking Ain only. As the students were called for the Morning Prayer Mithun slowly moved from his seat towards the door as he came close to the door a voice from behind echoed “excuse me” it was the same girl but she was along with 2 more friends and before Mithun could react she went away. For the entire day Mithun was excited because everything that was happening with him was an utterly new experience for him. After coming back from school Mithun’s elder brother asked him so how was the first day? Mithun only said beautiful….and went away. From the next day onwards he would only look her but it was his introvert nature that he never got the guts to speak to her.
After few days (dated 3rd July 2004) after consulting few of his batch mates he went to a chemistry tutor. After introducing himself to the tutor he asked him that he can join the batch that was going on at present. Tutor was very jolly kind of person and he said Mithun to come at 5:30 in the evening. I have heard a lot about you, that batch would be suitable for you. Mithun was surprised again how did the tutor came to know about him. At 5:30 PM when he reached the tuition he saw there was no body around so he sat silently and was waiting for the tuition sir to come up. After few minutes 4 girls appeared on seeing them Mithun’s happiness was on 7th moon as one of them was the one he saw on the first day. Sadly here also he didn’t speak up as the girls made the move and introduced themselves. Mithun was so shy that he couldn’t even put up his hand for handshake. Nevertheless he achieved one milestone as it was the first time Ain talked with her. Later Mithun discovered that it was because of Ain and her friends that chemistry sir could know about him and they call Mithun by a specific name. Mithun was happy from within but he didn’t know what was going in his heart as he never had these kinds of feelings before. He didn’t know what it was as only her name would make him smile.
Time went by and as he was not too bad in chemistry he got praises from the tuition teacher as well as from the girls. He seldom chatted with any of the girls mostly because he was a person who belonged from a different planet compared by his nature. Girls would talk with him and share some of the class stories as they would do among them selves. Slowly but surely Mithun was opening up he wasn’t as shy as he was earlier and the major credit goes to a girl who was from the other section and Ain off course. These were the first signs to show Mithun was changing and too on a positive note.
After few days it was raining in the evening, chemistry sir decided to teach them in the room instead of the terrace. After the class everyone was leaving Mithun was the last one to come out of the room on seeing him Ain came back and switched off the lights but didn’t tell anything to Mithun. Mithun who grew in government quarters didn’t know that one shouldn’t waste electricity resources. It made a deep impact to Mithun and he started to look Ain with more respect who with her simple acts taught valuable things to Mithun.
One day after school Mithun asked Ain to guide him to the house of the teacher who taught physics as Ain’s house was near to the teacher’s house & Mithun was new to the place. Ain used to come to school via bus at that time and Mithun with his cycle. Ain took the bus after school but got down one stop before her usual stop and waited for Mithun as he was far behind in his cycle. They both walked from there and Ain showed Mithun physics sir’s home. These instances meant nothing but were small things but made a great impact with each passing day on Mithun’s feelings.
Mithun’s physics tuition was followed by chemistry tuition one day Mithun asked Ain to wait near physics sir’s house at 5:00 pm so that they could go to the chemistry tuition together. But on that day physics sir was in mood to teach extra and he continued even after the scheduled time. Mithun was worried that Ain was waiting for him so he asked sir that he has to go. He left other people who were in the physics tuition of which 2 people were in the same chemistry batch along with Ain and Mithun. Mithun was carrying a cycle so he asked Ain to take the longer route to the chemistry tuition as he had to take much trouble to carry it over the railway over bridge. By the time Ain & Mithun reached Chemistry tuition the other members from the physics tuition had already reached to the chemistry tuition. They were worried as Mithun and Ain didn’t reach there & therefore called physics sir to see if anybody waiting there. Ain got unnecessary scolding that day from her friends as well as from chemistry sir but she didn’t complain Mithun a word. Mithun was feeling bad for Ain but Ain’s friendly attitude made deep impact to Mithun’s heart.
Chemistry sir was very good at heart and he often gave treat. On one day he asked one of the girls to bring egg roll for all and vegetable roll for Mithun as he was vegetarian. The girl who went to bring those brought all egg rolls instead. Ain was the first one to notice and said Mithun is vegetarian and he won’t eat egg roll. After the tuition she purchased one slice from her own pocket money and gave it to Mithun. This shows Ain was caring.
By now Mithun and Ain became good friends. Yet another day after chemistry tuition when everyone was leaving Ain came and stood behind Mithun and asked him to stay standstill. Mithun couldn’t understand the matter. Ain pulled Mithun’s T-shirt down as it had gone up over his waist and then she asked him to move. On that day going back home Mithun felt something unusual for Ain but he was such a fool he didn’t realize that it’s love.
One year passed they were all in class 12 now.
Ain now came to school with her blue colored ladybird cycle. One day after school Ain asked Mithun to exchange their cycle for some part of their journey on the way home. Ain was comfortable with Mithun’s cycle and she went off to some distance on the other hand Mithun was finding it very difficult to handle ladybird and he could hardly move. So he decided to walk with the cycle. Most of us would laugh at this but all these things made inroads to Mithun’s heart. Every moment that he shared with Ain was precious and priceless.
It was Mithun’s birthday he asked all his friends to come and celebrate his birthday at a restaurant. It wasn’t a problem with other friends as they had no problems but Ain thought her parents won’t allow her to come. She convinced her mother somehow, who later agreed. This was the last time when all of Mithun’s friends were together. It’s notable that Ain took all the trouble to come to Mithun’s birthday. This was the first and last birthday Ain and Mithun were together.
One day Ain had to deliver the morning news in school and she completely forgot about it. As a result she delivered the news unprepared by collecting few points from friends. She was very upset about it and asked Mithun how was the news who replied it was short but good. Ain took in a other way and kept on crying till the Tiffin period. Mithun couldn’t bear Ain crying and decided not to have the Tiffin and he sat in a corner by giving his meal to his friends. Ain saw Mithun sitting on the corner with his head down. She came and sat next to Mithun and asked what happened? Mithun didn’t reply but Ain knew Mithun was crying too she asked Mithun to have her Tiffin. Mithun ignored, Ain told Mithun that unless he eats she won’t have her Tiffin. Mithun raised his head and they both ate the Tiffin. Mithun was in love he realized but never had the guts to speak it too Ain.

After few days Ain joined the maths tuition where Ain’s friend and Mithun studied. Maths tuition got over by 8:30 in the night so Ain’s mother along with other parents would come and pick them up after the tuition. One of the best moment of Mithun’s life was the walk he used to have after the maths tuition to the over bridge. They shared those nothing talks but it’s memorable for Mithun. Ain too was comfortable with Mithun and she didn’t worried much on occasion when her mother didn’t come to pick her up as she knew she was safe.
It wasn’t that only good and happy moments were shared among them they had quarrels too and they won’t talk to each other for months. Most of the time quarrels were of silly nature but sometime it was serious because Mithun would speak anything without thinking. Many a times it would hurt Ain and she would behave as if Mithun is her enemy. Mithun would write apologize letters and beg sorry to Ain who would soon forgive him and then they would be friends again.
One major quarrel struck between them when Mithun said a harsh word to Ain. Ain curtailed all her friendship with Mithun. She would get angry even by seeing Mithun’s face. They didn’t talk with each other for nearly 3 and half months. It was only when one of the common friends spoke to Ain that she decided to forgive Mithun. Guess what it was the New Year eve of 2006 she called Mithun and wished him happy New Year and asked him to forget whatever that happened. They again became friends and it seemed as if they never had any quarrel.
After few days it was one of their friends elder sister’s marriage and both of them were invited among others. Mithun, Ain and 3 other people decided to buy something by contributing among ourselves. They had to decide the best gift at the optimum price. So they decided to look out for the gifts one day. It was hot and humid afternoon everybody after much exertion went home. Mithun was left with Ain who decided to see few more gift shops. They didn’t have the energy to climb up to the over bridge so decided to cross the station through the tracks. The stones around the track were uneven and Ain got unbalanced and was about to fall, she shouted Mithun who held her hand and avoided her to fall. Mithun held her hand few seconds even after she could balance herself. Ain told Mithun to leave her hand as she was alright now. Thought came across Mithun’s mind “I held your hand not to protect you from falling but to be with you throughout my life” he murmured it but not loud enough that Ain could hear. He left her hand and then they continued to look for the gifts. This was the first time when Mithun was about to express his heart but he couldn’t.
On that following evening was the marriage of their friend’s elder sister. The place of the marriage was far enough so they decided to go via rickshaw. Ain by now knew very well that Mithun was shy and girls today are bold then him. Ain asked Mithun “will you be comfortable to go with me in a rickshaw”. Mithun nodded his head in approval. It was the first went to a marriage ceremony together. This is yet another moment of Mithun’s memorabilia.
School life was nearing to its end. Mithun didn’t have good terms with few of the students of school who threatened to beat Mithun after tuition one day. When Mithun told this to Ain, she told to Mithun I would see how they could beat you in my presence. Ain was daring and this shows here as she asked Mithun to calm down and not to worry.
School life was over now and the only time Mithun could see Ain was at the tuition class which they were doing together for the entrance exams. One morning after the class Ain asked Mithun to come with her as she has to invite one of her friend for a movie. She told Mithun that only girls are coming otherwise she would have invited him too. Mithun went home after Ain invited her friend. After few hours Ain called Mithun and said some boys are also coming so you also come along. This was he first time Ain invited Mithun for a movie. They saw the movie “darna zaroori hai” the day was 2nd of May 2006.
Ain and 2 of her friends had decided that they would come to Mithun’s home on 5th may 2006. On that day one of her friend fell ill and the other decided to cancel the plan and make the plan to visit Mithun’s house some other day. But Ain insisted her friend to go on that very day. Ain with her friend did visit Mithun’s house that day. It was one of the happiest days of Mithun’s life. Ain came to her house and that too she didn’t inform her parents about it. It was only that night after Ain went back after meeting Mithun’s parents , Mithun realize that there are not much days before the entrance exams, and after that he would not be able to see Ain any more as all the tuition classes will be over. Fear erupt in his mind that his feelings towards Ain would remain buried in his heart and he would suffer throughout his life for not speaking about his love to the person whom he loved for so long.
It was after these two long years that Mithun finally did propose Ain on 17th may 2006.
It’s for People to guess the final outcome …did Ain accepted his proposal?
I have given my all to bring about reality in the story people who read this can only tell how successful or unsuccessful I was with my efforts.

Saturday, February 6, 2010

Is this love….time to think?

Today when I am speaking about love many would be in dilemma what does love really mean. When you see people around you it would be disheartening because you would hardly see people having a successful life. You can name hundreds those who broke but it would be difficult for you to name a single story with a happy ending because life isn’t a bollywood script where the ending has to be a soothing one.
This story isn’t for those who flirt and believe love doesn’t exist. This story is for those who believe love exists and whatever may be the case love does find a way. Here is a small story of a person who fell in love. I am stressing on the word fell as he never rose thereafter…
It’s amazing to know that when you are in love everything around you seems bright, full of life & happy. Even a second of apartness seems years to you & you feels as if your heart has stopped beating.
Ayush’s dream came true. He never thought he a day would come to his life when he would find the girl of his dreams.
More often then not long distance relationship fades away as was in Ayush’s case. Ayush was separated from his love as he had to go away for his higher studies but he promised his love that he will come back & they will be united forever.
During the early period Ayush would count seconds of his watch &would wait until the classes are over just to talk to his love. This curiosity of just hearing your love can only be understood by those who are in love themselves. They know how it’s essential for them to talk to their love.
But as time went by…Ayush’s call were becoming rarer not because his feelings were dying out but the girl asked her not to call her so often. Later calls were suppressed to messages which were further suppressed as there was no reply from other side. Ayush felt as if the bonding they had within them doesn’t exist anymore. He decided to come and meet his love & to know what was wrong with her.
Here also destiny had something else to offer. Ayush called the girl and the girl replied “what you call love is nothing but obsession. You never had any love for me and you don’t love me now also.” Ayush was shocked with her reply he asked the girl to meet him the girl replied “I don’t want to meet you. I have found my ‘someone especial’ &I am very happy with him. I have forgotten you and you don’t mean anything to me, if you really love me and want me to be happy then don’t ever contact me again.”
Ayush was heartbroken he couldn’t believe what he just heard. He came there travelling 1000’s of kilometers just to see a glimpse of her but the girl had other ideas. He went back with his love in his heart. Ayush’s life changed forever. He wasn’t the happy go around anymore. He blamed himself for whatever that had happened with him. He thought there was something lacking in his love that let his love to go away from him.
Ayush grew to an introvert who would hardly speak to others. Even if any girl approaches him he would run away. He would cry in solitude.
Even today if you see or meet Ayush you would think is he the same person who was in love once? His silence speaks how much he loved that girl.
Its hurting if you think from Ayush’s prospective. Many would suggest that Ayush should move on with his life. The girl was never meant fro him & she never loved him. There is no scarcity of girls & one day or the other he would find his true love.
My friends is this what you call love? To move on? To find a better match? I am afraid but this isn’t what love is. Many would argue that what’s wrong in having any other person after your beloved left you. If he/she is happy moving on with somebody else why shouldn’t we?
As I said earlier this story isn’t for those who flirt this is about those who really love. Suppose you have been pick pocketed once. Does that mean you would become yourself a thief and pick pocket all others? Similarly if someone leaves you & is moving with someone else does that mean you also have to move with someone? The person who left you might be flirting but if you were in love with him/her does that mean you will start flirting with others? True love happens only once and when it happens again and again it’s certainly not love but lust.
You were in love once & you are heart broken now suppose you start flirting after what happened with you & the other person becomes serious and then you leave him/her. What’s the difference between you and the person who left you? You also left someone heart broken.
Friends love is immortal. You don’t have to show the person who left you that can also move with someone else. If you really loved at first instant then you must live the way you were earlier before you fell in love. You don’t have to bother what the other person is doing. It doesn’t mean you have to like Ayush. The real person is the one who accepts life as it is. Who faces heartaches and troubles with utmost pleasure and doesn’t show his anxiety.
One day will come when the person who left you will feel guilty about himself/herself and if that person really loved at any moment in the past he/she will come back to you. Because love never dies…and true love always finds a way!!!
Thank god I am single. It’s high time for all those who are in love to think what their love’s worth. Life is not bed of roses every relation has to pass from the edge of the sword one day. They have to face some or the other problem in the day’s to come. Time is the biggest tool that decides the worth of a relation. Talking from the other prospective faith in your beloved and believing in your love helps you cross every barrier in life. With these words I would like to wish all those couples who really love each other. ‘Love is divine and it’s heaven when you have the right person with you’.

Friday, February 5, 2010

Trust: building block of relation

Often we hear that belief and trust are the two sides of a coin they go hand in hand with each other. What’s the major inspiration that keeps people to have a strong bonding with each other? What makes them go along each other even with millions of differences in their thinking? What’s the force behind that keeps them believing the other when the odds are against them? What makes people stick together even in adverse situation?
The answer to all these question lies in one word “TRUST”. Be it any relation the only binding force that keeps them go along is trust. If you don’t have trust on anybody be it parents, friends, colleagues, life partner or be it anybody no relation will sustain.
Here I present a small story of Ajay where you would know how relations can turn up to bitter end if you don’t have trust on your partner. Ajay and Akansha were happy couple and it seemed that they are made for each other and their match is made up in heaven. Everything changed for them after this incident. Ajay’s friend Jitendra some how got the phone no of Akansha and Ajay didn’t get any clue of it. One night Jitendra sent a message to Akansha
Jitendra: I am glad that you have contact with Ajay.
Akansha was baffled by the message and she was mesmerized to know who the person was and how did the person came to know her phone number. After much interrogation she came to know that it was Jitendra one of Ajay’s close friends. Without consulting the matter with Ajay she presumed that Ajay might have given the number to him. She was angry with Ajay.
On the following night Ajay who was ignorant about all this sent Akansha a message that she shouldn’t wake late at night it affects health. We know when people are angry on somebody even small things make them furious and this was the case with Akansha. She thought Ajay was insulting her and replied in rage. Call it destiny or fate Ajay received the message and as he set to reply her, god knows what went wrong every time he sends a message a message appears on his cell sending failed. He didn’t receive any message from Akansha that night. But in the morning as he woke up he saw a message flashing in his mobile screen why aren’t you replying to my messages? Ajay didn’t know what to do as he searched the inbox and didn’t find any more messages. He was very disturbed by what happened and he didn’t know why she was furious on him.
At around 11 am Akansha called Ajay and before Ajay could speak anything Akansha blurted …
Akansha: why did you give my phone no to Jitendra?
Ajay was shocked he could only utter I…
Akansha: why did you give my no to him?
Ajay: I haven’t given your number to anybody.
Akansha didn’t believe him and said
Akansha: you are a liar. Why did you abuse me yesterday? Why weren’t you replying to my messages?
Ajay: I never meant to abuse you. Whatever I said it’s for your well being and I didn’t receive any of your messages.
Akansha: you are a liar. I have checked outbox of my cell and it was displaying that all messages were sent.
Ajay: I didn’t get your messages and I couldn’t reply because I was getting the message time and again sending failed. I am not lying anything I am speaking this by taking the name god.
Akansha: you are a liar and you can lie by taking the name of god. I don’t believe even a single word of yours. I hate you.
Before Ajay could utter a word she kept the phone. She was calling from STD booth but Ajay called back and found the booth operator saying it’s a booth. Ajay called in her cell but she wasn’t responding. He sent 2-3 messages but he never got any reply.
A sad end to what could have been a dream for them. It was worse for Ajay because he not only lost his love but a friend too in the form of Akansha and Jitendra. That day was the last time when Ajay talked with Jitendra.
What was wrong between them? What was the boy’s mistake? Was it the entire girl’s fault? All the circumstances that she was facing be it Jitendra sending her a message, Ajay not responding to her she is right to think that it’s all Ajay’s fault. Instead of blaming anybody we have to think in a way that a person can hurt others only when he/she is hurt themselves. A happy soul can never betray others. No soul is bad from heart and it’s the circumstances that force people to do whatever they had done. The essential thing that was missing was “TRUST”.

Friends here I am with one more of my blog that has to do with the self assessment. The above stated story could be best understood by those who had faced a similar situation in life. I only have one thing to say nothing can be done to what had happened with them; only thing that people can look forward is to have faith in the person they are around with at present. If they don’t have belief they may face a similar situation time and again. People should be patient enough to listen to the view of person concerned instead of listening and believing others.
This is life as you sow so shall you reap. So if you want to be trusted you have to trust others first.

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Spiritualism…the need of the hour!!!

Today when we are living in 21st century many would say god doesn’t exist, even science has marked it as improbable and is not convinced for its existence. But the main question that arises has science discovered all the solutions of the universe the answer is no, it hasn’t. There is one thing that’s beyond the scope of science and it is governed by the unseen power that is the almighty, three letter word GOD.
But there are still those who don’t believe in god…well it’s a real life story especially for those who don’t believe in god and those who believe it will strengthen there belief for certain.
The story is of Aman and the date is 28th June 2009. Aman was very depressed and he decided to go out and drink so that he may forget all his past. He went out with 3 of his friends to one beer bar just before entering the bar he saw a general store near the bar and decided to buy something.( I must tell you about Aman he was in final year and he drinks Bournvita everyday and this is the first time that he is going to a beer bar) He told his friends to go and he would follow them after coming from the general store. He went to the general store and saw an old man there he asked him..
Aman: uncle, do you have Bournvita?
Shopkeeper: yes I have. You are an Engg student isn’t it?
Aman: yes I am
Shopkeeper: students of first year do drink all these nutritious drinks like Horlicks and Bournvita but as they become senior they start drinking something else and he was indicating to the person who entered the bar just now.
Before Aman could speak a word the shopkeeper spoke again.
Shopkeeper: I have never seen any student of final year to come and buy Bournvita. When they come to first year hardly 2-3 % student drinks alcohol but as they go to final year you can’t find even 2-3% those who doesn’t drink alcohol.
Aman: sir I am in final year and I am asking you for Bournvita only.
Shopkeeper was glad and he handed over the Bournvita to Aman. Aman paid the price and began to walk away. As he was about to enter the bar the shopkeeper called him.
Shopkeeper: can I speak to you for a moment?
Aman: sure
Shopkeeper: you are just like my son. I want to suggest you something
Aman: yes go on
Shopkeeper: be what you are. Don’t do anything by following others. Don’t ever commit anything that you have to regret afterwards. In life you have to face problems time and again be brave to face and don’t ever let yourself rule by these materialistic things. If you give up now you will never be able to control your life after wards. I think you are intelligent enough to understand what I am speaking you can go now.
Aman was astonished by the words of the shopkeeper and he moved towards the bar. The guard asked his identity as it was his first time to the bar. Aman showed his identity card and the security guard lets him go inside. Aman was sitting along with his friends but the words of the shopkeeper kept swirling in his brain. He decided not to drink. His friends impelled him to drink and told him that he shouldn’t bother about the past and once he has 2-3 nips he would forget everything. Aman was unmoved and he said he won’t drink.
After all his friends have had enough they decided to come back. As they were moving out the security guard stopped Aman
Security guard: sir you didn’t drink?
Aman: No I didn’t
Security guard: It’s the first time I am seeing anybody who is coming out of a bar without being drunk. Security guard told Aman that he looked tensed but the decision of not drinking was a right one. He further spoke initially people drink because of sorrow, happiness or mere excitement to taste but later it becomes a habit. During the early period people drink alcohol but later alcohol drinks people.
Aman was further baffled and he decided to thank the shopkeeper for showing him the right way. When he went there he didn’t see the old shopkeeper there instead found a young man of nearly 30 years.
Aman to the shopkeeper
Aman: where is uncle ji?
Shopkeeper: who? My father ? he went back to home.
Aman: why did he go back?
Shopkeeper: my father is sick for around 6 months. Doctor has advised him to take rest and not to come to the shop. He was not coming to the shop for around 4 months now but as I was about to leave for the shop in the evening my father told me that he had an urgent work and he compelled me. I asked him to take rest but he said he has to come today. He was talking to you right?
Aman: yes I had a talk with him an hour ago.
Shopkeeper: Do you know my father?
Aman: no it was the first time I talked with him.
Shopkeeper: What did he tell you? After you went he went back to home saying he has had his work done?
Aman: (laughs and then spoke confidently) god is within human being and today god has stopped me from taking a wrong step.
Jest: it’s proven that if you do believe in god then god will come at your help whenever you need him the most. This story wasn’t against alcoholism but it was a story that shows that everything in life is not meant for everybody. Alcohol is certainly not meant for Aman and god has to come in the form of a human being to stop him doing something that’s not meant for him. I don’t think science has any answer for this: how did the old shopkeeper came to know before hand about Aman and why did he force to come to the shop?
It’s said every person has a good and evil hidden within him and it’s up to the people to discover themselves. People who discover their good side often does thing which are out of reach of science and we often call it’s the almighty who is doing all this. It’s because of this cause many a times a miracle does happen. It‘s the reason that even after all our effort in whatever we do we have to leave it on god. So it’s the need of the hour to do our work as honestly as we can and leave the rest to the almighty.
If you believe in god then surely you will find examples of his existence and if you don’t then be sure that you have to believe in the almighty someday.
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